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Relationships require hard work for them to last. That is why it’s essential for every individual to take a good look at themselves before jumping to the next commitment. In this way, they will be able to identify some of the toxic traits that might have that might be a hindrance to a good relationship.
Here are some tips that can help you identify some of these traits.
1. Anger
This is one of the most crucial traits that can make or break a relationship. Being quick to anger might make you react in a physically or emotionally abusive way towards your partner. A mature relationship is one that has emotional control where you both show love and respect regardless of the situation. You can start by practising emotional control or even going to see a therapist for more severe cases.
2. Selfishness
Relationships are about teamwork. You both need to be loving towards one another and make sacrifices rather than operating from a win-lose dynamic. When you’ve been single for a long time, you might be used to having things your way all the time. Leave this trait behind if you are planning on having a good relationship. Give more and show people that you care.
3. Dishonesty
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One toxic trait that should not be brought to a relationship is dishonesty. When you begin a relationship with lies, your potential partner might not be willing to trust you at all. Any relationship that begins with lies is doomed. Show him or her that they can trust you so that they can be open with you. Also, avoid being mean. This will come off as judgmental and nit-picky. Handle your partner with the same care you would want to be handled.
4. Lack of boundaries
You should learn to set boundaries rather than saying yes to everything, no questions asked. Remember that you should be in control of what you accept and what you don’t. This will allow your partner to know how to treat you based on how you communicate. You should also keep in mind that you shouldn’t allow other people to involve themselves in your relationship. Set boundaries with family and friends. In this way, your partner will have a sense of security in the relationship.
5. Narcissism
When you let your ego get in the way, your relationship will not last as long as you want it to. Analyse yourself and see if you exhibit characteristics of self-centeredness and lack of empathy. You should be more compassionate and kinder to your partner even when there’s nothing to gain on your part. These are ways to help you be more loving and considerate.
6. Drama
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If you seem to attract a lot of drama around you, step back and see what you could do differently. Toxic and dramatic relationships are romanticized in the movies which are not healthy in real life. You should choose the things you spend your energy on to avoid a roller-coaster of toxic fights and arguments. It is not worth it.
7. Passive aggressiveness
If you exhibit a pattern of defensiveness, avoidance and lack of communication, you should probably get rid of that before you get into a relationship. When you build emotional walls between you and your partner, it becomes difficult to understand each other and handle disagreements. Do you tend to play the victim to avoid taking responsibility for your actions? Practice emotional maturity and build ways to communicate effectively for a successful relationship.
8. Obsessive tendencies
Do you find yourself trying to be involved in every single thing your partner does? Constantly asking where they are, who they are with, or even going through their phone when they haven’t given you a reason not to trust them is very damaging. Your partner will not feel trusted and might back out of the relationship before it even starts. Focus on your life and don’t smother your partner too much.
