Q: I am a Christian man and I’m in love with an Indian woman. We both love each other and we are planning to get married soon. When we are together, we get along well and we are compatible with each other. I realised that we don’t like discussing our religious differences because I think we both have fears that it can break our relationship. I personally know that my family might not approve of our marriage and I fear telling my lover. What should I do? We really love each other. Kindly help me, aunt.
A: The most important thing to know is that when two people of different faiths marry, it is not their religious differences that can create marital problems but the lack of communication about religious issues becomes a stumbling block the couple will have to face because of the same. From your question, it seems like you both have fears concerning your religious background. Please bear in mind that going silent concerning the issue for fear of a break-up will not help the situation but it could be worsening it. The best direction, therefore, is to face this challenge head-on before you make any concrete decision of taking the relationship to the next level. I suggest that you first accept the reality of your different religious background and then have open communication with your girlfriend. Start by exploring if you truly love each other and whether this love is above your religion. At this point, both of you should agree on the most favourable direction to take. This means that your relationship should not be hurt by one of you taking sides with his or her faith but it should work for the better of your union. Both of you also need to accept and respect each other’s religion bearing in mind that it is not religion that binds you but love. Please note that this should be a decision for both of you now and in the future. I suggest you talk with your parents before becoming judgmental that they will not approve. Let them know that this is the woman you love and that they should support you by accepting her. Your girlfriend should also talk to her parents concerning the same and as such you will be able to make a sound decision concerning the relationship. I wish you well.
